[Text] 09th Page

[hoperaider]

[Hello, Pokeland. This is actually not Jake's 'gear that he's using at the moment, but one Dirk Strider's. He kind of borrowed it.]

I'm Dirk Strider and I have an irony problem.
I also have a problem of equestrian nature, but I'm too fucking cool to get into the gory details.
My friends are awesome, but I'm too proud to admit it to their faces or some shit.
Dave's movies are fucking awesome, fight me.
Anime is great, even if a certain goober can't pronounce the fucking name right.
What else.
Oh.
I throw Pokedexes at people who sing annoying as hell and or catchy songs.
I also snore like a hedgehog and sneeze like a kitten.
Carry on, Johto.

Comments

[plushaeusrumpified]

hey lil mama let me whisper in yo ear.

about how we will never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever have sex!!!
i will never touch the butt!
or the boobs!
never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever.
okay?!
this will be the most platonic of marriages you have ever and will ever be a part of.
in fact i think i might cut off my hands just so i will never feel the urge to touch things my hands do not belong on!!

[tentacletrainer]

But John!
Even after I touched your butt? I mean, spanking was involved even.
And you would leave it a one sided affair?

[plushaeusrumpified]

[djkghkfdgfbhkdxfg what
WHAT
WHATTTT]

nope nope nope nope nope nope!!!
we are not doing the butt thing ever again!
never!
NO MORE BUTTS IN THIS RELATIONSHIP, ROSE!!!
no more spanking or smacking or popping or anything of the sort!
i am officially going celibate and it is for your own good!
i will put protection on my anus so that you can not touch it either!

[tentacletrainer]

Protection on your anus?
Are you more afraid of me simply touching it or perhaps indulging in something a little more intimate?
That starts with an s and ends with an x?
Come on John, you're okay with making out a little!
Surely this can't be any different? ;)

[plushaeusrumpified]

WOW NO MORE MAKING OUT EITHER!!!!!!
just no more of any of that romantic gross mushy bullshit rose.
none.
forever.
there will be no words with s or x in our vocabulary.
we will get rid of them.
all of them.

[tentacletrainer]

You know as well as I do that that's impossible.
Oh wait. Let me try that again.
You know well I do that.
I mean look at.
We're going to get no where in if we keep up.
And don't even get me on the fact that you can't even my name.

[plushaeusrumpified]

fine point made.
but that does not mean that we'll be making out any time soon...
or ever!
even with s and x's in our vocabulary we won't be doing the one that is relevant to this conversation!
that particular word is OUT.
out out out out out.
goodbye word.
goodbye forever!!

[tentacletrainer]

And when, pray tell, have you ever refused swapping spit with me before?
Especially when a little intimate touching was involved?
Honestly, you always seem so enthusiastic about it!
And you know how much I like it.

[plushaeusrumpified]

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LALALALALALALALALALALALADGJKLHFDGJDFHLKDFJHLDFJHFDJKGHFJGHDFJKGHDFLKJGHDFKGDFKJGHFDLGHDFLJKGHDFJKGJHSDLFHSADJFHSDOKGJSDHGJLKSDHGKLJSDHFJHSDJKGDHLGJKDFHKGHDFLKHESGJKHLDJKGHDGJHDFKGJDFHGKJHGJKFHDJKLGDHGKJDHGJKDSHGJKDHGJKLDHGSDHGJKGHDSJGHLSDJKGHSDKJGHSDJGHLDJKSGHSDJKLFHSAJFHJKLSDGHLDSJKSDKLHFJKGHSFKJGHFDJKGHDFKJGHSDFGKJHSDFJKGSDJKGMNSFGKSDHJKLLGJDFKGHDFGUIDJUKJFGHDFKJGHKDSJGHSDFKLJBGDFGHKLDFHSDLKJSDFHJDKLSHGJKLSDBGMSDHKFJDSHFKSDFJDSHGKSDJFCHDSJKFHSDKJGHDSLJGHLDKSJFHSDJKHDFSLKGHJKDG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tentacletrainer]

How about we continue this conversation...
.....
..
......
........
.....
..
..............
................
........
...........................................in private?

;)

[plushaeusrumpified]

NO!!!
GOODBYE ROSE.
GOODBYE FOREVER.

[And he ollies off to go yell at John via his voicemail.]

[tentacletrainer]

Oh
I guess I will just
Go to my father and see if he can heal my broken heart
If you're really serious about this...